4.4. An example

Years ago, I had a dark night of the soul.

I couldn't get out of bed. I was miserable with my work. I was realising that everything I'd been taught was not what I believed in anymore.

This was one of the hardest times in my life.

At that time, I taught a masters level class on «mental illness.» I remember asking the director if I could speak more about holistic healing. Taking into account childhood wounding, sick systems, + teaching nervous system regulation. The director was familiar with my Instagram (at the time it had about 10k followers) + she loved the work. But it wasn't allowed to be taught. And I fully respected that decision. So I said no. I stopped doing what I didn't believe in. Even though it felt (very) scary.

What I do believe is that more people are waking up. I believe that one of the biggest misses in mental health is that it leaves out the human soul. Humans need: meaning, purpose, awe, joy, wonder + play. They need to feel a part of something bigger than themselves.

Human beings aren't machines made to work, self-sacrifice, + chase external validation. Of course rates of depression + anxiety are sky high – we are all living our lives trying to conform to a dysregulated, dysfunctional society.

So many people want to remove the stigma of mental illness + I also hope we start asking: why are we all so emotionally unwell? What patterns got us here? What can we do to heal ourselves? How do we create healthy family dynamics to raise secure, open, resilient children. No one else can do this for us, except us.

When you start to do the work, you start to see how deeply conditioned you are. And you make the beautiful choice to actually see yourself. To see your inner child. And to courageously face your past – something most people spend a lifetime avoiding.

The path isn't easy. You'll be misunderstood. And you'll change the world as we know it. Things only change when we do. Things only change when we stop re-living cycles + start to wake up to the power of choice.

• You're more sensitive to other people's energies, less willing to do small talk, plus wanting more time to be alone.
• You are releasing the conditioned belief of love as a romantic fairytale, in favour of love as an opportunity to grow, evolve, plus to learn to trust yourself.
• You can see the generational trauma with your family, plus have chosen to be the person who heals it.
• You realise that societal norms are rooted in a ton of dysfunction, plus you're choosing to no longer participate in them.
• You are starting to realise that you've been conditioned to think, feel, plus believe things that aren't necessarily true.
• When you look at your past, you can see that you were unconscious, mostly on autopilot doing the best you could with the level of awareness you had.
• You understand that you're ready, plus willing to take your own unique path in life that many don't understand, and that's ok.

A spiritual awakening is not usually pleasant. Often it feels like confusion, frustration, anger, sadness, grief, or being out of place. This can be uncomfortable and challenging because it's an intense time of personal growth. But despite how difficult it might feel, you're not going crazy. You're evolving, awakening.